The “Buck Moon” Supermoon Sans Cape

Tonight is a full moon. Called the Buck Moon, it’s not simply a full moon but also a supermoon (alas, no cape), meaning it will be a bit more intense than a typical full moon because it will be closer to Earth and appear brighter and bigger. Fun fact, the technical term is called “perigee,” which I kind of love.

Full moons typically deal with conclusions, completions, and endings, necessary ones, although necessity doesn’t mean they won’t hurt. It’s a time to clean house of things that aren’t working for you – with or without your permission. The supermoon takes it up a notch and also emphasizes your hidden emotions, ideas, and thoughts (forcing you to confront hidden agendas and bad habits) along with a heaping amount of extra energy to help you manage all of the actions you need to take and changes coming your way. And clarity. Lots and lots of clarity and answers.

Now that we’ve set the foundation with a refresher on what full moons and supermoons mean, let’s talk about this particular supermoon: the Buck Moon.

There’s an interesting tension to this supermoon because it’s Cancer season astrologically but the Buck Moon is occurring in Capricorn. Cancer is about the home, love, private life, nurturance and emotion. It’s a murky, sensitive water sign. Capricorn is an earth sign, extremely focused, hard working, the public life, career, goals, responsibility and accountability.

Sounds like an epic clash could be underway, right? Well, “more things in heaven and earth, Horatio” holds true here. Cancer, with its inward focus, represents the origin – possibly even unconditional love – while Capricorn, with its outward focus, represents the goal – perhaps conditional love in a way. And you must have both and not neglect either area. To do so will make you unbalanced and result in unbalanced energies.

This supermoon invites us to think about our commitment to our public and private lives, career and families and seriously ponder if there is an imbalance and how we can restore balance. All that increased focus on hidden things will help bring truths and imbalances to light and the extra energy and clarity will help us fix it. And in many ways, this introspection is non negotiable. It will come out. It will be released, whether or not we want it to be. So the solution is to take a deep breath and prepare for some deep soul searching. Prepare also for emotions to be released, and they may not be pretty or refined but inchoate.

As the Buck Moon rises today and its influence continues to be felt over the next two weeks, admire its beauty and transformative power and as Madonna said, “Express Yourself.” The cosmos demands it.

***

I learned a lot while putting together information about today’s Supermoon. It’s been an emotional few days, and I can feel the tension and imbalance in my own life. And those who have been on the receiving end of them could definitely vouch for how rough and inchoate my feelings are. I’ve had a lot on my mind, and I still have much more to think about. In some ways, it helps knowing that it’s all going to bubble up and out regardless of whether I want it to or not. I never want to make excuses for my behavior or feelings, but the message of the Buck Moon Supermoon resonates with me.

May it help us all to find the critical balance we need and require (there is a Force joke that practically begs to be made, but I’ll refrain)

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It’s a Cold Moon

“The moon is a friend for the lonesome to talk to”

Carl Sandburg

Tonight or rather yesterday is the final full moon of 2022, but one of the things that makes this moon so special is that it will still appear to be full Thursday. And it’s appropriate that in a month that celebrates juxtapositions and extremes such as beginnings and endings, longests and shortests, birth and death, loneliness and love, this moon will be visible longer than it might otherwise be due to the sun setting earlier.

It has been fascinating this year to learn about how each monthly full moon has a name and was given a meaning. And I admit to taking joy in seeing the moon in various places and significance this year: over the ocean at the beach, in an eclipse at 5:30 AM, the end of my driveway just now. There was something about the finality of 2022’s full moon that I needed to witness.

This moon is called the “Cold Moon” and the Mohicans called it the “Long Night Moon”. I like that. It wasn’t exactly cold or even cool when I went outside, but it was quiet. It was breezy. I could imagine early humans looking up at the sky in wonder and marveling at what magic this was that made the moon increase in fullness over the course of a month and then appear to disappear. It doesn’t take much of a mental leap to see how they concluded offerings needed to made to bring back the moon and from there, religion takes shape.

Astrologically there is a meaning to this moon too. It takes place in Gemini (ruled by Mercury) and symbolizes receiving information – could be a simple answer or resource that comes at the right time or a perspective you had not considered. Full moons are culminations, completions and endings and letting go, which all sounds quite appropriate for this time of year. And sometimes like holidays themselves, there is a feeling of bittersweetness about so much sturm and drang, preparation, giddiness, excitement, and then…it’s over. At the same time, Mars retrograde is here and since it takes place in Gemini, it could be unexpectedly easy to feel tense, anxious and say harsh words. Try to fight the urge to do too much. I know I myself have experienced these feelings this week and owe a few apologies and have a need for more rest.

Maybe I’m feeling overly introspective and possibly maudlin (probably just tired and worn out myself), but I feel the year creeping towards its end. There is a darkness about the holidays that we choose to overlook. There’s a huge amount of forced levity and merriment and almost a threat to be happy or else and by god, you better be happy for your blessings. And the other side of that is fatigue and exhaustion. It’s hard being the sole Magic Maker. It’s hard trying to keep all the plates spinning. And it’s hard trying to have nice things for yourself when the tree is half decorated and the cat keeps climbing it and everyone at work is just as surly and tired as you are and what the fuck is for dinner.

It’s hard when the holidays come on the heels of Deathiversary and all you really want to do is stay in bed with the covers pulled over your head (but don’t forget to wash the sheets and comforter!). I’m feeling some endings acutely and some beginnings coming faster than I might like or prefer.

I am grateful for all of my blessings. I’ll have my pity party here and make magic and sing carols through the neighborhood. And I’ll enjoy it.

And hopefully I’ll find a little magic of my own and return refreshed like the new moon.

…But even when the moon looks like it’s waning, it’s never actually changing shape. Don’t ever forget that.

Ai Yazawa

Wolf Moon

It’s the first full moon of 2022, and it is referred to as the “Wolf” moon. I kind of like that. It sounds a bit feral, a bit mysterious, a bit wild. And (at least here) it is cold and windy out, and I can imagine a wolf howling in the dark night. It has a few other names, too, but I like “Wolf” moon best.

My, isn’t someone feeling poetic tonight?

Astrologically, full moons are important and symbolic. They represent culmination, hidden information coming to light and literally illumination on situations or relationships. They symbolize seeing things clearly. And they are dramatic, chaotic and intense, stirring up emotions. Sounds fun, right? Has it been a full moon for the last two years?

And you might be thinking, “Astrology. Huh. KeAnne, isn’t that a bit ‘woo’ for you? I thought you were a rational, logical person?”

Of course it is. I mean, it’s not like I know my natal chart, rising sign or the location of other key planets (Virgo sun, Gemini Rising, Mercury Virgo, Venus and Moon in Leo, Mars and Jupiter in Cancer). Not like I own a deck of Tarot cards and have given readings before (see college, 1995-1999). Not like I have a crystal ball. Not like people expect me to keep them apprised of when Mercury Retrograde occurs (that would be now. Started January 14 and will go until early February).

I’m not sure I can explain it. There is a part of me that is fascinated by the unknown, by mysteries. Maybe even rational, logical me likes to think, as Hamlet says:

‘There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, / Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.’

I consider it a feature, not a bug in myself. And frankly, those Tarot card readings in college gave me much greater insight into psychology and, well, therapy than anything mystical. Still haven’t ever seen anything in the damn crystal ball. Good conversation starter, though.

But. The point of all of this is the mystery of the full moon, the chaos it brings and what it illuminates. I haven’t made it a secret that my household is full up on therapy. If the cats could get therapy, I’d arrange it.

I’ve learned a lot about myself in the last year. A lot. It’s given me a lot to think about and process. Today I had a major epiphany in therapy. I’m not going to go into the details because that is private and personal (I do have SOME boundaries!). But some situations, perceptions and behaviors were illuminated.

When I grapple with how to describe my therapy journey – and my journey in general – over the last year, I return to fiery imagery and themes: the phoenix, a crucible, and most recently, thawing. Lots of thawing. I feel like some parts of me have been frozen and frozen for a very long time. But they are thawing. And that’s horribly messy and confusing for someone like me who does prefer to feel in control and felt like she had a good understanding of herself.

But it turns out that maybe the thawing is revealing key parts of myself that I had put up barriers around. And they are good parts. And maybe barricading them away didn’t make me feel like my best self. Actually, I felt like a rather horrible self. And as the thawing keeps progressing (I’m trying really hard not to think about Global Warming and melting glaciers as I write this), I am discovering myself. And I like what I am discovering. The worst feeling in the world is not liking yourself. The best is finding something to like. Because if you don’t like yourself, who will?

So Wolf Moons, and full moons, and epiphanies and melting frozen parts…somehow it is all related and makes sense in my mind. It was a good day. A painful day. I had some anger. I almost cried because that is what I do now (what are warm tears but melted ice?). But at the end of the day, I was happy to reacquaint myself with this part of me. Welcome back. It won’t be easy, but we’ll get there.

Chimney falls and lovers blaze
Thought that I was young
Now I've freezing hands
And bloodless veins
As numb as I've become
I'm so tired
I wish I was the moon tonight
-Neko Case